10 rules for christian dating dating now ep 4 16
);spend every night in the same bed; and never, ever be bored. These and other so-called "rules" for marriage need some serious debunking.
And it's not just because rules your mother may have passed on are outdated; some may be downright damaging.
In fact, "breaking some marriage 'rules' may be the best thing you can do for your relationship," says Barbara Bartlein, RN, MSW, psychotherapist and author of one come from?
Turns out, it may go as far back as the Bible, which advises not letting the sun go down on your anger.
"That invites comparisons, and when you compare, someone comes up short." The bottom line: You need to be polite and caring when it comes to your partner's feelings. One problem with this rule is that you and your spouse may not have the same definition of a great getaway (you like to ski, he's a beach bum). Lombardo, is the belief "that you have to be each other's likely to split.
"Create couple-only time during which you do not discuss bills or children, where you do fun activities and enjoy each other's company." The kids'll be all right. So if one of you occasionally decamps to the guest room, don't sweat it.
Most of marriage involves time together, one on one, in a friendship.
And spending intentional one-on-one time—not too serious, just time—allows both parties to experience what it would be like to continue in the relationship.
Long-term relationships survive on commitment and trust, out of which grows love. The problem with this so-called rule, says Bartlein, is when couples confuse a calm, predictable union with a bad one.
The mistake here is to believe that you can live forever on fireworks, or even just love, alone. A drama-filled relationship may feel exciting, but in the long run it's not likely to be healthy.